I’ve been reading Gabbie Bernstein – The Universe Has Your Back. One of the things that stuck out for me was how we’re programmed to act with fear as opposed to love. How we choose to perceive things; through fear or love can effect the way we live our life.
So this week I tried to adopt the fearless mindset. And the actions I’ve taken would suggest I am now fearless. I’m here to look after myself, my mentality and my being. Sometimes in order to do that we have to put things at risk and we have to face up to the thoughts that Fear is telling us may happen.
But I was on the news back in February, if you recall. And February Alessandra had some really wise and great words of advice. ‘The only way we can stand up to bullies is with confidence and the only way to gain confidence is by pushing boundaries’. If we put Fear in place of the word bully it really gives this sentence a meaning to resonate with. The more we stand up to fear, the more confidence we gain and the more fearless we are and thus in turn acting more in the name of love.
I have a lot of love for my body and lingerie, and these two loves were never something I was able to harness. I’ve suffered with anorexia and my body became a consequence of a severe mental illness. I used to live in fear I wasn’t small enough. Or was too fat. Or that I didn’t deserve nice thoughts or things. After I left the ED Clinic I started standing up to Anorexia and I changed that fear toward my body and self into love. Now, I can’t be dishonest and say anorexia isn’t a big part of my life still – it is, I’ve just had a month off work on the sick because my illness was aggravated and my eating slipped and exercise took over. But I still continued to stand up to fear and love my body and treat myself to new underwear (and gym clothes 😴). And why did I continue to love myself through this blip? Because it’s aiding me in the battle to get better and be better than ever.
One thing I’ve always really pushed for people to do is be true to themselves and for me now that really is loving my body. I love lingerie. Clearly I love taking photos in that lingerie too. At first I was fearful – what would people think? Would my messages be overlooked? Then I met those questions with the answers of ‘I’m doing this for me, and if it helps others then they’re ready to be helped and they understand and that’s great’.
You’ve got to do you.
I say it with all my underwear photos – everything is temporary. So find that love for yourself, inside and out, now. Because things change. For me having that love has really kept me alive this last month because certain external things changed and my mentality inside pertaining to anorexia, anxiety and PTSD changed. But I’d done some groundwork and had a solid pillar of love already created so I’d built up a defence mechanism without realising.
The comeback is going to be more than worth the setback.